What's Going On in Apartment 3C?
by Shaynezo
Summary: Aria and Spencer go to Hanna and Mona's apartment for dinner, and Aria discovers something completely unexpected. Note: This is not a multi-chapter story; it is a one-shot and will not be continued.


Hey guys! This is just a quick one-shot of a request I had

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"Why are we going to this again?" Aria whined.

"We're going because it's polite to have dinner with someone when requested," Spencer explained patiently for the fourth time. "You'll be fine."

"I'm missing my show," Aria grumbled from behind her. She tightened her grip on the plastic-wrapped bowl in her hands.

Spencer rolled her eyes. "This is why we have a DVR. It's recoding." She paused halfway in her ascent up the stairs to Hanna and Mona's apartment. "You're not behind me, are you?"

"..No."

Spencer turned around to see Aria still at the bottom of the staircase. "Come on, Ar," she said affectionately. She walked back down and guided Aria to 3C, the apartment in which Hanna and Mona had moved into three months ago.

Spencer knocked lightly on the door and cast a sideways glance at her girlfriend. "Play nice," she warned in a firm, albeit gentle tone.

"Yes, Ma'am," Aria replied sardonically.

The door flew open and there stood Hanna, in a lovely black dress with slight ruffles on the hem and thin straps.

"Spencer! Aria! Come on in!" Hanna moved to the side and shut the door behind them. "It's so good see you guys," she said, giving each a quick hug. "Can I take your bowl?"

Aria passsd the bowl off eagerly, and watched as Hanna walked dantily toward the kitchen.

The apartment was much bigger than expected, and decorated with what Aria assumed to be furniture imported directly from Italy.

"Wow," Aria commented. "This place is sweet."

Spencer grinned at Aria. "See? This isn't so bad, now is it?"

Aria huffed. "Ask me after Mona opens her mouth."

And just as soon as her name left Aria's lips, she appeared.

Mona was clad in a short, tight red dress and when she saw Aria and Spencer, her face broke into a wide grin and she rushed forward, enveloping them both in a tight hug.

"You have a lovely home," Spencer said politely. "Right, Aria?"

"Yeah, I have to pee. Where's the bathroom?" Aria asked.

"Down the hall, last room on your left," Mona instructed. "Do you want me to take your purse?"

But Aria was only half-listening, her gaze fixated on framed photo of Hanna and Mona. The two had their arms around each other's shoulders, and their smiles reached their ears. Aria could see a multitude of arcade games in the background, and recognized it as Dave & Buster's. What the hell? Why weren't they invited? Rude.

"Aria?"

"Huh?" Aria blinked. "Oh, yeah, here." She shoved her purse into Spencer's arms. "Hold this."

"You're so polite," Spencer drawled sarcastically.

As Aria walked down the hall, she could hear her girlfriend chatting conversationsally with their friends. Mona was just so - well, she was Mona. Shouldn't that be enough of a reason for Hanna to stay away?

"I don't even know why they're friends," Aria grumbled to herself. She came to the second-to-last door on the left, and twisted the knob. The door swung open and Aria walked in, flipping on the light and let out a startled cry.

In the middle of the room, there was a contraception with many straps and padded seating. It extended down from the ceiling, and Aria couldn't help but inspect it.

"What the hell is —" Oh. OH. It was a sex swing. Aria bent down and read the company's name that was engraved into a leg.

"WhipSmart Pleasure?" Aria read out loud. "What the fuck…" Why would Hanna have a sex swing in her apartment? Unless…

Oh, God.

"Aria?" Spencer's voice rang out. "Are you OK?"

Aria jumped and quickly backed out of the room, turning off the light and shutting the door behind her.

"There you are!"

Aria yelped and spun around to see Spencer. "Spence!"

Spencer raised an eyebrow. "Are you alright? You look a little flushed." She pressed the back of her hand to Aria's forehead. "You don't feel warm.."

Aria pushed Spencer's hand away. "We have to go. Now." She tugged on Spencer's hand and tried to drag her down the hall, but Spencer didn't budge. "Spencer!" she protested.

Spencer exhaled. "Please don't tell me you clogged their toilet. I told you not to eat so much spicy Thai food last night," she chastised fondly.

"No!" Aria bristled. "No, just – look!" She forced Spencer into the room and snapped on the light, waving dramatically in front of them. "See!"

There was a brief moment of silence before Spencer started to laugh.

"Wha-?" Aria stared at her girlfriend. "This isn't funny!"

Spencer smirked. "I'm just surprised this isn't bedazzled. Come on, let's go."

"Aren't you upset by this?!" Aria shrilled.

Spencer shrugged. "Not really. Why would I be? You really thought Mona and Hanna were just friends?"

"Yes.."

"Well, regardless of that, this isn't our business. Let's go."

When Spencer and Aria returned to the dining room, dinner had been served and Mona and Hanna were waiting patiently for them.

"Not a word," Spencer hissed into Aria's ear as they sat down. "This looks great. I didn't know you could cook, Han."

"Please," Mona snorted. "I cooked this. Hanna isn't allowed to microwave popcorn."

"I set the microwave on fire once," Hanna grumbled.

"..Twice," Mona reminded her with a grin.

"Shut up!" Hanna shot back. She shoveled a mouthful of green beans into her mouth.

A few minutes of silence passed as the girls ate, the only sounds being the occasional clank of a fork against a plate and the light thud of a wine glass being set back down.

"So," Mona began, breaking the silence,"how's work?"

Spencer groaned. "As grand and remarkable as the last Presidental election."

Hanna snickered and gave Spencer a high-five. "Nice."

Mona rolled her eyes and turned to Aria, who had been strangely quiet. "How's the writing? I loved your first book," she said earnestly. "It was so good."

Aria made a small sound and clamped a hand over her mouth. "is ine, I mess," she mumbled through parted fingers.

"What?" Mona and Hanna asked in unison.

"She said,'It's fine, I guess," Spencer said. She turned to Aria and shot her a look, and Aria slowly lowered her hand.

"I mean, it's great," Aria replied. "I'm It really is. I'm almost done with the sequel. I might just swing the last chapter."

"Swing?" Mona raised an eyebrow.

"WING," Aria's face turned red. "I meant wing!"

Next to her, Spencer groaned.

Hanna blinked at Aria. "Are you OK?"

Aria looked like she was fighting with herself before blurting out,"WE SAW YOUR SEX SWING AND I ALMOST SAT ON IT!"

Spencer pinched the bridge of her nose and closed her eyes. "Oh, my God, Aria. Really?"

Silence from the other two. Then, Hanna got up and left, with Aria chasing after her. "Han, wait! I'm sorry!"

Spencer downed her entire glass of wine and immediately poured another. Mona didn't say anything, and just calmly ate her salad.

"So.."

Mona glanced up. "Yeah?"

"Can Aria and I borrow your swing?"

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What did you guys think?!


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